The English Language

“We have really everything in common with America nowadays, except, of course, language.”
From The Canterville Ghost by Oscar Wilde

For good, bad or otherwise,  my language and vocabulary has slowly been altered since arriving in England. There are three categories where I've discovered the greatest change. Below are a few that I've noticed recently. I shudder to think of the ones I'm doing of which I am completely unaware.

It's Just a Phrase

As with any region of the world or circle of friends there are certain words which just become a part of your vernacular whether you're aware of it or not - sometimes even against your best intentions. 

1. "To be honest" / "in all honesty" / "honestly"
• Why should I feel the need to say this? Does it mean I'm not being honest otherwise? I'm never revealing shocking truths when this phrase pops into my conversations. But I just can't help myself, I say it all the time! However, since I realized I say this, I've also found that the people I spend the most time will also say this. So now the question is - who started it?
2. Toilet
• When I first arrived in England I put this reference to the restroom/bathroom on the top of my list of words which I wouldn't use. It's so crass! Restroom is so much more polite. And now? Yep, you guessed it, about six months into my English stint I suddenly realized that I'd switched. Now I don't even try to fight it.
3. Maths
• This is in the -sub-category of strange "s" use or non-use difference between British and American English. While at first I couldn't image how I could find myself switching, the British style is slipping out more and more the longer I'm here. And in my opinion both sides of this have ones that don't make any sense and there are no rules for either. In the UK Geometry, Algebra, Trigonometry, etc are referred to as Maths (as opposed to Math in the US). Okay, so I get this, there is more than one type so adding the "s" is logical. Ready to have your mind uncomfortably bent? They call football (ie soccer), rowing, swimming, polo, and any other collection of physical activities, Sport. For you American speakers let me give you some examples. A British person would say: "What kind of Sport are you into?" At universities the collection of group physical activities aren't clumped together as "Sports" but "Sport" - as in when you want to check out what is going on you go to the Warwick Sport website. I know that these things are minor but it really throws a listener off when you first hear it because you know something is wrong with what they just said but because it flies by so quickly it takes several attempts to figure it out. And now I'm saying them the British way. Ugh.
4. Chips
• Contrary to popular belief, if you order "fries" in the UK they will know what you are asking for. They have American television and movies. Neither sweet potato fries or curly fries are referred to as chips. They are fries and should be ordered as such. Ordering fries instead of chips, however, one way they can tell if you've just come across the pond or been here for a while. I switched to this one fairly quickly. The same confusing usage can be found with the word crisp. If you want potato chips you ask for crisps. However tortilla chips are called just that. See previous reason for this inconsistency. There are a few foods that are different which haven't slid so easily into my vocab - such as calling a cookie, a biscuit or sweet bread, a loaf (I will always make Banana Bread not Loaf thank you very much), or referring to zucchini as courgette. A girl as to put her foot down somewhere.
5. "Dine In or Take Away?"
• You'd think that when someone asked you this instead of "for here or to go?" that it'd be easy to know how to respond. You'd be wrong. You know what they are asking, and you're given two options, all you have to do is choose one. But somehow they ask and all I can do is stare at them. It isn't that I don't know what they are asking, but I've been programmed to respond with "here" or "to go." When asked something else you're brain immediately fills in the words it expects and then you realize that you aren't sure what the correct answer is. You don't what to stay at the coffee shop or restaurant but you have no idea the correct words are to communicate that. I've said "to go" (or "here" depending on the situation) before and the look I get back is as blank as the one I'm sure I gave them when they asked the question. Again, it isn't that they don't know what I'm saying, it's just that they gave me two options and I didn't select either, at least not with the words they expected to hear from me. This one has been harder to adjust to, mostly because it only comes up about every other week or so and I'm usually going through caffeine withdrawal and my brain isn't functioning properly at that moment.

Mes Speak Good!
You'd think that studying English Literature for my MA would strengthen my language skills. How wrong you'd be. While my written skills have improved (or at least I think they have), my verbal ones have not. This might be due in part to the fact that most of my friends here aren't native English speakers. Now, I'm not saying they don't have a (mostly) good grasp on the English language, it's just that I've picked up a few... let's call them quirks, in my speech patterns and word usage.

1. "I come"
• Ah, so much can be done with that sentence (or partial, totally incomplete and nonsensical collection of two words). If one keeps their mind out of the gutter (because I'm sure that's where your mind went first) the main reason for this being appallingly bad for me to use is its lack of meaning. I could blame it on a higher percentage of my communication being through text messages but in reality I point (and others like it - such as "I go" and my favorite "I eat") to having friends whose native languages don't have articles or prepositions, both important aspects of a complete sentence - as these sentences demonstrated (if you aren't sure what an article or preposition is click here. I'm not judging if you need to check, I know for most of you it's been a while since you studied those sorts of things).
2. "I text you"
• This is just one example of this type. The options are really limitless. While a sentence is technically - Subject, Verb, Object - all of which are present in this sentence, it is missing those key words which makes it really mean any thing. 

Hello, Goodbye, Huh?

Having traveled extensively in the past ten or so years, I admit that I have picked up a lot of greetings in different languages. On a regular basis I unconsciously say "ciao," "hola," "adios," "bon jour," "gracias," "merci" and other random words I've picked up in a cursory attempt to be polite when in a foreign country. So too, have I picked up similar greetings here. Yet it was surprisingly more difficult to do here. 

1. "Cheers"
• Unlike in America, this is not just a word used when raising a glass in celebration. It is put in place of "thank you," mostly in the case of small things. As a Minnesotan I have been raised to say "thank you" for everything - it's the polite thing to do and we are nothing if not polite (at least to your face). My switch to this was intentional. It all came about when I realized that everyone thanked the bus driver when they got off. I think this is strange. So I thought to myself, "this is a perfect example of where "cheers" is a good fit. You know what I'm talking about (at least you Minnesotans), there are those times when a person is really just doing their job, nothing special, they aren't going above and beyond, but it is the polite thing to do to acknowledge the service or act they just completed for your benefit. A "cheers" lets then know you noticed. So I pulled it out the first time during term one when I was getting off the bus - and it was a categorical disaster. If you haven't noticed this before, I apologize for bringing this fact to your attention: The American accent is rather sharp and crass sounding. Take the word "aunt" as an example. Only Americans say "ant". Brits (and almost every other person I know who's not American) pronounces it "ahnt." try saying it both ways....no, really....I'm waiting for you to do it....okay, hear the difference? I'm not implying there's anything wrong with the American way (well, with "aunt" I am, I've been an "ahnt" person since I watched Katherine Hepburn in Bringing Up Baby and I heard her say it that way. Oh, and if you haven't seen that film you really should, it's Hepburn and Grant at their comedic best). So back to the original story ("cheers"ing the bus driver for the first time, in case my tangent and sub-tangent made you forget). So I walked past the driving and said (I thought pretty casually) "cheers." It however, came out as "ch-EERZ." The ugly American accent at its very best. But I was persistent and I can now declare that I say it like a local - but with the same obsessiveness as my "thank you" always was in the States. Now it just slips out without thought. I even had to watch myself when I traveled to Paris with YEAH. The kids gave me no end of grief that I always said "cheers" instead of "merci." We'll see how long it sticks around when I head back to Minnesota. I'm actually looking forward to the confused looks when I reply with it!
2. "You a'right"
• This one threw me for a loop at first. For a solid two months when I walked up to a check out or register and someone said "you a'right" (you'd think this would be said as a question, but it's not), I'd just stand there stunned for a moment before I was able to go on with my order or begin bagging my purchases. Eventually I adjusted after associating the greeting with the Minnesota "how are you?" However, here they don't really expect any sort of response, you're just supposed to get on with whatever you're doing (ie either order or start bagging, or whatever). My Minnesota breeding wouldn't allow this. You must say something back! At home I'd reply to "how are you?" with "good, you?" To which they would say "good, thanks." We don't really care how this perfect stranger is, it's just what we say. Same goes for this greeting, except they don't even want to finish the exchange. So I came up with an acceptable alternative which allows me to respond and it is being only slightly awkward. Now I reply: "yeah, yeah, you?" I only get strange looks once in a while.
3. "Hey ya"
• This is my favorite greeting. Mostly because it really doesn't make any sense. "Hey" on its own is a logical (if a little abrupt) way to say hello when you see someone you know. But adding "ya" on the end is bizarre. The reason for this is not totally clear to me but I can only guess that it is the British version of "hey ya'll" but can be applied to seeing a singular person not just a group of people. I mean they smash and drop syllables in almost everything else, why not a greeting (see "you a'right" for another example of this)? I love it. Saying "hey ya" is breezy and fun. It sounds so happy and upbeat. When you say it you seem pleased to see the person you're meeting (even if you aren't). It's great. This one's a keeper, I think.

I hope you've enjoyed learning a little about my changing vocabulary! Now when I get back to Minnesota and say any of them you A) know what I'm talking about B) can't mock me. I would also not be against some of them finding their way into general American vernacular.